No bruises can be seen
Bullying doesn't have to be localized to the playground, home, office or street, where the big guy picks on the little guy, or one who is different from all the rest. It doesn't have to be the powerful overthrowing the weak. It can also happen when we look at how we treat our inner-selves and the relationship to our outer-selves...when ego slaps around our soul-self.
The soul-self, being that part of us that who we are at the core of our being. It is who we came into this world as and who we will leave this world as. As we play through our life-time, it is the balance of the soul-self and the ego that weave our perceptions of what we call “our reality”. When it comes to bullying we can draw a lines back to a moments as younger people and noticed events or situations where something bigger and more powerful overpowered the weaker - smaller. Whether within a family, a friend group, work or play, we draw connections thinking that - "the more power we have, the more control we have".
What does having control really mean and how am I affected every time I try to exert control over my own thoughts and feelings? It’s like declaring that you aren’t good enough and can always be better. When was the last time you made an inward comment about how silly or stupid or ugly or... "I'm not ... enough." The last time we needed to push through a pose awkwardly in yoga class, struggle through the pain of a physically demanding job, close the next business deal, or even pass the next exam. Being “good enough” is ingrained in us from a very young age. It only takes one comment at a critical moment in our beginning stages in development of “you’re not good enough” that can stay with us for a life-time.
Bullying our inner-selves, our soul-selves, may start with an outward casual (or brutal event) but the responsibility lies in the ego taking up the charge to carry this onward through our life. Internal power struggles, are often overlooked because “I’m not hurting anyone else, I can beat myself up and take it on”. Bullying is bullying and no matter WHO takes it... it doesn’t need to be given in the first place.
Start seeing what it feels like to give yourself a little slack the next time you find your ego taking slap-shots at your soul-self. With a smile on your face say to yourself you're the coolest person in the park. As a friend of mine Chris Brandt has commented so many times in yoga classes... “no matter what other’s may say or how you think you feel different...
...you ARE enough.”